The emotions our children experience aren’t always based in reality, but they certainly feel real. It would have been easy for me to dismiss and minimize Averie’s emotional pains. From an adult perspective, we can see how trivial their circumstances can be. But to a child, the emotions are valid and real. And depending on your child’s temperament, those emotions can be expressed in very different ways.

Combining my role as mom and my skills as a therapist, I embarked on a lesson of emotional resiliency with my precious daughter..

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We’ve all heard the analogy of how a butterfly transforms from a caterpillar. The goal is to bring hope to the person struggling: “One day, I’ll be the butterfly.” We think about the wings, the beauty, the freedom. And it’s true that we are all experiencing the process of transformation. But talking about becoming a butterfly often skips over the “becoming” part of the process.

Have you ever seen a butterfly emerge from its cocoon? It’s a struggle. The process takes about 12 hours. This may not seem long, but given a butterfly’s lifespan of two weeks, 12 hours is a significant amount of time.

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I was recently talking with my friend, Alli, about her own quaranteen predicament. She and her husband were in the middle of a well-deserved Sunday nap when their eighteen-year-old barged in.

Her son asked if he could make a run for the border, the Taco Bell sort. In a groggy haze, (you know, when you wake up and have no idea what day or time it is), Alli remembered, “Wait, what, no! We're in lockdown mode!” She had to tell her hungry son to find lunch at home because of social distancing. Frustrated by this turn of events, he slammed the door and stormed off.

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Overnight, our world has changed.

Grocery stores are decimated by desperate shoppers. Malls, theaters, and airport terminals are abandoned. We are being asked to self-quarantine and only go out for essentials. If you had told a friend earlier this year that you wanted to practice “social distancing to flatten the curve,” they would have stared at you blankly. But it’s not just our jargon that’s changing— it’s our way of living.

You are no longer just a parent to your child. With schools closed indefinitely, you are now their teacher. In addition to suddenly being thrust into the role of teacher, you’re also acting as their counselor, seeking to help your child process all that is going on while trying to make sense of it yourself. Being a parent always requires wearing multiple hats, but wearing this many hats can be overwhelming

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May is Mental Health Awareness month.  Mental illness continues to be a taboo subject for many.  Because of shame and the stigma of mental illness, too many individuals do to not seek out the help they need.  

Many parents do not seek treatment for their children because of misconceptions and misunderstandings.  For example, the myth that children will outgrow mental illness or it's “just a stage.” Fact: children are less likely to “grow out” of psychiatric disorders than they are to “grow into” more debilitating conditions.

I want to share with you some important statistics about children and mental illness, show you some warning signs, and give some helpful resources.  Let's be educated as individuals and as parents.  Your child may not be suffering, but chances are he or she may have a friend who is.

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May is Mental Health Awareness month.  Mental health continues to be a taboo subject for many.  Because of shame and the stigma, too many individuals don't seek out the help they need. 

Adults aren't the only ones to struggle with mental health...so do children.

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